A lot on my mind
by Shortcake82
Summary: DL! Lindsay's thoughts and feelings about Danny and her past.
1. Chapter 1

A lot on my mind

Disclaimer: CBS owns CSI: NY and all it's characters.

This story is D/L! If you want me to do more of the story, then it will have a happy ending. Starts after 'And here's to you, Mrs. Azrael'.

How have I been feeling lately? That is a good question, and the answer is miserable. I worked a case with Danny the other day at a hospital. We processed the doctor's lounge together. We talked only about the case. There was no teasing, no laughing. There definitely were no flirtatious looks, like the ones he used to give me.

I know I asked for space, and said we just needed to do our jobs, but I miss him. I want the old Danny back. I want the old us back. I wish things were easier. I wish I could tell him what was going on, but I can't. I wonder if I did tell him the truth how he would feel. Would he hate me? Would he still trust me? Does he trust me now? I trust him; he has always been there when I needed him. He has also never given me a reason not to trust him. Everything he has told has been the truth. I haven't given him a reason to trust me. Well, maybe when I gave him the DNA results before Mac. I don't know if that made him trust me or not.

Over the summer I have found myself wanting more with Danny. Oh, sure I have thought about it before, but never thought about actually doing something. I was really excited when he asked me out, that's when everything got messed up. That's when my past decided to resurface. I really wanted to go to dinner with Danny that night, but that phone call changed everything. I was all mixed-up, I couldn't think straight. I didn't even realize how much time had pasted until Mac called. The look on Danny's face when he told Mac he was late because he was meeting someone for dinner broke my heart. I felt like I was going to throw-up when he said that thing about being stood-up. He sounded so hurt, even though I could tell he was trying to make light of the situation. When he asked me if we were okay, I wanted to cry, and tell him everything. I realized later on after I had time to think about it, that I couldn't move on until I put my past behind me.

So now here I am lonely, hurting, and missing my best friend. I wish I could put my feelings on hold just like our 'relationship', but I can't. I'm still falling hard for this man and it's getting harder, and harder to be away from him. I know I can't have Danny until I have the other man out of my life. I wish I knew how long that will take.


	2. Chapter 2

Doing some more thinking

Disclaimer is in the first chapter. Set after 'Sweet Sixteen'.

I can not believe I got bit by a snake. I know I have a dangerous job, of all the things that can happen at a scene a snake bite was the last thing I thought would happen. Well, maybe in Montana, but not in New York City. There was only one good thing that came out of this. Danny called and left me a voice mail message saying he was glad I was okay. That's what he said. "Linds, I heard about the snake. I'm glad you're going to be okay." I know it's not much, but I could tell he really was worried about me. I don't know what I was expecting. He most likely thought I would be upset with him if he did or said anything else. I know it's for the best, but I really wanted him to be there with me. I was really scared. I just wanted him to hold me and tell everything was going to be okay.

Danny's message wasn't the only one on my voice mail. I was so glad the doctor told me I could go back to work, that way I wouldn't have to think about my other message. I was not expecting to hear his voice. It's been so long since I heard him speak. I almost forgot how soothing it is. I am so confused right now. I know how I feel about Danny, that part is clear. How I feel about the other man in my life is the part that's not clear. He's coming to NY and wants to see me. I'm not going to call him back, because I don't know what to say to him. I don't know if I want to see him or not. I wish I knew what was going to happen. That way I would know if I should see him or not. I wish I had someone to talk to about all of this. I know how everyone in Montana feels about this. Well what they would feel if they knew he was back. I could really use my best friend right now. To bad I pushed him away, and to bad he let me.


	3. Chapter 3

The man from the past

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Summery: Not from any episode. I'm going to tell you who the man is that coming between Danny and Lindsay. I'm really not very good at the characters talking to each other thing. That's why the first two chapters were the way they were. So if this is bad, I'm sorry. I'm trying my best. **_And thank you for the great reviews. That helps a lot. You guy_ are so great!**

Danny asked if I wanted to go grab some lunch with him today. After reasoning with myself, I said yes. It surprised us both. I told myself I was hungry, and it was better than eating alone. We went to a pizza place not far from the lab. I thought it was okay, but Danny said it wasn't as good as Ray's. He offered to take me to Ray's some day. I hope by going to lunch with him today didn't give him the wrong idea. I was just having a weak moment today. I had a really great dream about him last night. In my dream I was able to tell him everything that had been going on. About my sister and about Rob, and he understood. He told me he still trusted me, and was glad I told him. That way I wouldn't have to deal with it alone any more. Then he kissed me and the rest of the dream just got better and better.

(Authors note- Here goes nothing. Cross your fingers, that it won't be really bad.)

Right now I'm sitting on my couch eating Ice cream and thinking about Danny. I want to call him so I can hear his voice. To just talk to him would make me feel so much better. A knock on my door interrupts my thoughts. I get up to answer it. When I open the door I can not believe my eyes. "Rob, what are you doing here?" I ask. I'm surprised I can even talk. "When I called I told you I going to come and see you. God, Lindsay you look beautiful." He says, reaching out to take me into his arms. I pull back. He does not look happy about that. I don't want to hurt him; I just can't handle that right now. I was just thinking about Danny for god's sake. "Can I come in?" He asks me. "Yeah, sure come in." I step back to let him walk into my living room. My apartment is small. Not as big as the one we had in Montana, but of course the cost of living is cheaper in Montana. "You can also sit down if want to." I tell him as I notice he is looking around with a confused look on his face. "Uh, thanks." He walks around my coffee table and sits down on the couch. Rob picks up the ice cream tub I left on the table and says. "I guess you were thinking about something pretty important if you brought out the cookie dough ice cream." I blush a little remembering what I was thinking about. "Yeah, it was very important. At least to me it is." I say sitting in a chair across from him. He's still looking around my apartment with a funny look on his face. "There aren't any pictures of us around here." He finally says, looking me straight in the eye. I don't want to hurt him, but I have never lied to him before and I'm not going to start now. "I didn't bring any with me to New York." It's the plain honest truth. I just left out the part about why. That's not lying is it? Maybe he won't ask. "Why?" Or maybe he will. "I didn't want to bring all that with me. I wanted to start over here, to forget all about it." I tell him, trying to explain the best I can. "To forget all about it, does that include me? Did you want to forget me, Lindsay?" He asks me. "No! I know you did what you felt you had to do. I know if the situation was reversed I would have done the same thing. The job is just as important to me as it is to you. You went undercover to save lives. I would never fault you for that, but you also need to look at it from my point of view just like I did with you. I didn't know when you would be coming back, or if you were coming back. I couldn't just sit around and wait. I wanted to move on with my life. I couldn't just sit in limbo forever. I know you know me well enough to understand that. I needed to move on with or without you, and I hadn't seen or heard from you in two years, Rob. Two years, I couldn't wait anymore." He looks down at his hands. I look at them too. He is picking at his nails. That has always been the way I know he wants to say something, but can't find the words. "What does this mean for us, now?" He finally asks after what seems like forever. I can't hold back tears any longer. They start falling down my cheeks. "I want a divorce."

Author's note- I hope this was okay. I hope you picked up the clues I left you guys about were my story is going. Hopefully I will get to the next part soon. I also hope to try to figure out how to get the story of what happened to Lindsay's sister in the next part. It's a lot harder then I thought it was going to be, to put my ideas in story form. So write me and let me know what you think of this last part. Thank you guys, you are my inspiration. I love reading all your stories.


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry this took so long to write. I got writer's block, and then I got sick. I really hope you like this part. I really am trying.

Before anything else could be said there is a knock at the door. I sigh and get up to answer it. When I look through the peep hole my heart stops. I can't believe this! This can not be happening to me. I open the door only enough so you can't see into my apartment. "Hey, Danny. What's going on?" I say, hoping he is buying the fake smile on my face. With the look he gives me I'm guessing he sees right through it. Oh, that and I blocking the door so he can't see in my apartment. I'm sure that seems weird. "Uh, Flack and I are going out to grab a few beers. I thought you might want to join us." He says, looking at me funny. "Look, Danny as much as I appreciate the invitation, it just isn't a good time for me right now." Just as I finish, I feel Rob right behind me. He opens the door wider. I think I feel a panic attack coming on. Just when I think he'll do some male marking his territory thing, he surprises me by saying. "Lindsay go ahead and go. I'm leaving anyway." What does he mean he's leaving? "Rob where not done talking yet." I say confused. "No, I don't think there's anything left to say." He gives me a sad smile and kisses me on the forehead, and walks passed Danny down the hall. I feel like I want to cry. I never meant for it to go this way. I didn't want to hurt him like that.

Danny right now is looking around at everything, but me with his hands shoved in his pockets. I let out a big sigh and step back from the door. "Come on in." He looks at me and asks. "Are you sure?" I just walk over to the couch and plop down and playing with my melted ice cream. Danny comes in and closes and locks my door. Then he walks over and sits in the chair I was sitting in not to long ago. "Are you okay?" I know he wants to help, but I also think he is curious about what just happened. "I don't want to talk about it." I say, getting up to put the ice cream back before it melts any more. When I come back to the living room Danny has moved over to my book self and is looking at all my pictures. He probably is looking for a picture of Rob. He turns around when he hears me sit back down on the couch. "Who was that?" Was, that's a good word to describe Rob. He was my first love. He was my loving husband. He was my best friend. He was everything to me. He was all those things. Now, "He's just someone I used to know." Danny doesn't buy that explanation, even though it is the truth. Well, not the whole truth, but I'm not ready for the whole truth. "Danny I said I didn't want to talk about it." Danny walks back over and sits next to me on the couch. "Then why did you ask me to come in?" Oh, like I know what I'm doing. My whole world is flipping upside down. "I don't know. I don't know anything right now." I say, closing my eyes and leaning my head back on the couch. "Lindsay…" He stops and takes a deep breath. Uh oh, I don't think I'm going to like where this is going. "That guy, are you dating him?" See I knew I wasn't going to like what he had to say. I think I'm going to go with the truthful, but vague answer. "No." And also short. "Where you dating him?" That one is going to be harder to answer. I wasn't prepared to talk to Danny about this. I was kind of hoping I wouldn't have to. Short, truthful, vague. "A very long time ago." We had our first date six years ago. He didn't ask me if I was married. "Does any of this have to do with why you can't be in a relationship with me?" Avoidance might work with this question. "I thought you said it wasn't about a relationship, just dinner and a few laughs." I say. "I lied. You were giving me the 'it's not you it's me' speech. I didn't want to look like a idiot." He says, as he gets up and starts pacing. I hate when he does that. It normally means he's starting to get mad, or already is and is trying to clam himself down. "I didn't give you 'the speech'." He stops pacing and looks at me with one eyebrow raised. "Okay, I did, but I really meant it. It's not you. Trust me you don't want to be a part of my life." What the hell I am I saying? Am I stupid? Lindsay, you want this man in your life. Don't scare him away. "Yes I do. I want to be a big part of your life." Oh, good he's fighting for me this time. Wait; do I want him to do that? Yes and No. I want him and hope he wants me too. "Danny, I want you in my life. I'm just not ready yet." He looks like he is about to say something. I stop him, and say. "Before you ask, no I don't know when I will be ready. Even though I'm a little bit closer now, there are still some things I have to take care of first." Danny lifts up my chin so that I am looking at him, and says. "So that guy did have something to do with it." I nodded. "Let me guess your not going to tell me what it is." I nodded again. There is nothing I can say. I can't tell him what is really going through my head. 'Sorry Danny, even though there is a good chance I might already be in love with you. I can't be with you until I get a divorce.' I wonder if he would hate me. Danny's phone chirps. He looks down and sighs. "It's Flack. I'm late. Are you sure you don't want to go with us?" I shake my head. "No. I need to be by myself right now, maybe another time." We both get up and walk to the door. I open it for him. Before he steps out he says. "If you change your mind, about anything, or even just want someone to talk to, call me anytime." Then he leans over and kisses me on the forehead, just like Rob. Two forehead kisses in one day, I am such a loser. Danny gives me a smile and waves then walks down my hall. When he is out of sight I close my door and lean back on it. I cover my eyes and slide down to the floor. There is no maybe about it. I love Danny Messer. And there went my silly notion that my new life in New York might be easier then my old life in Montana. I get up off the floor and go get ready for bed. When I drag myself into bed, I prey for an empty, dreamless sleep. Even though I know I'm most likely to have another really good dream about Danny, just because my mind likes to torture my heart.

I think I'm going to forget the whole sister thing, because my story just won't end right if I don't. So please just forget I said anything about a sister. Sorry!


	5. Chapter 5

I'm sorry this took so long to get out, but after 'Silent Night' I kind of lost interest in my story. I'm back though, so I hope you like it.

Well today started out well enough. Danny and I laughed and talked over coffee in the break room this morning. We are even working on a case together. Danny's being really great about all of this. He's not pushing me to talk. He's still flirting and teasing, but that's just Danny being Danny. I do catch him watching me sometimes. I'm not going to say anything though, I kind of like it. Everybody wants to go grab a drink after work tonight. I was thinking about going. I was even thinking about sitting next to Danny. That was before I got the bad news. I got a fax from Rob's lawyer today. Along with the letter there were some legal papers, but not the legal papers I was hoping for. They were separation papers. Not divorce, separation. Apparently in Montana you have to be separated for a year before you can get a divorce. In the letter, Rob explained that the two years he was gone didn't count, because we didn't file for legal separation. So now I have to wait a year before I can start my life over. I can't ask Danny to wait a year; it's not fair to him. This isn't fair to any of us. I wonder if you really can get a quickie divorce in Mexico. Nah, I want to be fair to Rob. We have joint assets we need to split legally. Maybe I should go out with the team tonight. I could use that drink.

I just walked into the bar and looked around for everybody. I see Flack at the bar talking with a pretty red head. Everybody else is sitting at a table in the back corner. I walk over and as I get closer I see the only two empty chairs are next to Danny. I know earlier I said I wanted to sit next to him, but that was when I was in a good mood. He'll notice I'm upset, he always does. Then he'll either try to get me to talk about it, or he'll not say anything, and just give me that lost puppy dog look. He always gives me that look when I won't let him in. I just realized I stopped walking and was standing there staring into space, when Stella started waving me over to the table. So I walk up to the table and see Flack's coat on the chair on Danny's right, so I guess that means I'll be sitting on his left side. At least Sheldon is sitting at the end of the table to my left. He is always a good person to get lost in a conversation with, that way maybe I won't have to talk to Danny that much. "Hey, guys." I say as I sit down. I am looking at everyone except Danny. Suddenly there was a hand putting a beer down in front of me. I look up and see Flack. "Thanks. What happened to the red head?" I ask him. He sits back down in his chair, and takes a sip of his beer then says. "She's got a boyfriend." I nod and look over at Sheldon hoping to start that conversation I was thinking about earlier. Now that I'm looking at him my mind goes blank. I'm probably nervous about trying to hide what I'm going through from Danny. I look down at my beer and feel like an idiot. I look up when I hear Stella say my name. Then she asks me if I'm alright. I can feel Danny's eyes on me. As I open my mouth to lie and say I'm fine, when my cell phone rings. Saved by the phone, I guess. I look at Stella and say. "Sorry." I flip open my phone and say hello. "Can you hold on a minute? I'm in a bar, I can't hear you." I tell the person on the phone. I stand up and tell the group. "I'll be right back." I walk out of the bar.

"Sorry about that. Now, what where you saying?" I asked, as I leaned against a brick wall. "I asked if you got the fax from my lawyer." Rob repeated. For some reason I get a creepy chill up my spine when I hear him say 'my lawyer'. "Yes I did. Isn't there anything we can do?" I ask. "You should get a lawyer and ask him." He answered. "Look I've got to go. I just wanted to make sure you know what's going on." He said. "Rob, wait I want to talk about this. I really don't want it to end this way." I said. "I really can't talk about this right now." Then he hangs up on me. I take a deep breath and calm my self down before I go back in the bar.

I walk right to the table and grab my coat and purse and tell them I have to go. I say bye and leave. I don't get very far outside before I hear Danny calling my name. I keep walking pretending I can't hear him over the traffic noise. Unfortunately he catches up with me and is walking next to me. I just ignore him and keep walking. We get all the way to the subway entrance, when I finally turn and ask. "Are you going to follow me all the way home?" I put my hands on my hips and glare at him so he knows how serious I am. He looks me in the eye and says. "If that's how long it will take for you to tell me what's going on, then yes I am." I don't look away when I answer back. "Then what will you do when I still don't tell you, and then shut the door in your face?" He gives me a lopsided grin and says. "I'll wait outside your door until you do." "You promised not to push Danny, and trust me when I say today is really not the day to do it, or it will seriously damage our friendship." The smile slips off Danny's face, which breaks my heart. I feel like crying, instead I just turn and walk down the steps to the subway. What is wrong with me? Why am I destroying one of the best things that have happened to me in a long time?

Authors note: Hey like I said up top, I am so sorry this took so long. I hope no one was waiting for it or what ever. I know right now it does not seem very fluffy, but my real life isn't perfect so I figure my pretend one shouldn't be either. Don't worry there will be some D/L love in chapter 7 or 8. I can't keep them apart to long, it just breaks my heart. I hope you are still enjoying my story.


	6. Chapter 6

I have had the worst day possible. I got stuck with a case that is going no where. It's not like we don't have enough evidence, in fact we have too much. So much that we don't even know what is important to the case and what's not. The most frustrating part of my day was not the case believe it or not, it was working with Danny. After our conversation at the bar the other night, we have barely said one word to each other, until today. This is the first time we have worked together since then. I think I will just lay here on the couch for the rest of the night. I don't even feel like getting to fix myself some dinner.

I guess I fell asleep, because I jolt awake when I hear someone knocking at my door. I get up to answer it. I feel sorry for who ever it is, because I am not in a good mood. I look through the peephole. I really am not surprised as I should be, but personally I have always believed if your day can't get any worse, it always does. I open the door to let Danny in. "Hey, I thought we could look over what we got so far on our case and see if we can make sense of it. I even brought dinner." Danny said holding up a take out bag. "Why not? I haven't eaten yet anyway." I said making my way over to the couch to sit down. Danny closes and locks my door, then walks over and puts the bag on my coffee table. "So, on plates or out of containers?" He asks sitting down next to me. "Depends on what you got." I open up the bag and look inside. I see four Containers of Chinese food. "We can eat Chinese out of the containers. Fork or Chopsticks?" Danny smiles at me for the first time in days. "Chopsticks." He says, reaching into the bag and pulling out a set of chopsticks for each of us. He starts pulling out the food, as I set out the stuff in the file folder he also brought with him.

We have been working for about two hours. The food is all gone. Danny ate most of it, he always does. I don't mind though, for some weird reason I think it's kind of cute that he's always hungry. I can feel him looking at me. I'm sure some how I will regret this later, but I look up and stare back. We are looking into each others eyes. I can't remember the last time I let myself look into those beautiful blue eyes. The look in those eyes right now is the reason why I didn't let myself look. He is leaning towards me. I know I should pull away, bring up work, do something to stop this, but I can't. I don't know why, but I'm actually going to let him kiss me. I can feel his breath on my face, my eyes flutter shut. Oh my god, his lips are so soft. He tastes like Kung Po Chicken. His tongue runs across my lips. I open them to let him in. I feel his right hand slip into my hair. I don't know where his left hand is. Oh, now I do, it's running up my leg and around my waist, and the feel of his hands on me feels as good as his lips on mine. Until now I never even noticed what I was doing with my hands. I don't know what they have been doing, but right now they are running up and down his back. I can feel his muscles tense under my touch. I feel butterflies in my stomach, knowing that he reacts that way to my touch. I move my hand so I can tuck it up under the hem of his t-shirt. (Picture the green t-shirt. The one that's really tight.) I feel his warm skin under my finger tips. His breath catches and his hand tightens on my waist and in my hair. When I feel his hand under my shirt and sliding up my back, I realize what we are doing, and know that I have to stop it before we go too far.

When I pull back the look in his eyes makes me want to kiss him again, but I stay strong. I remove my hands from his body, and take his off of mine. I can't even begin to describe the feeling of loss I feel when I no longer feel his skin on mine. The look that almost drove me crazy a second ago has been replaced with one of confusion. "Danny we can't do this. You have no idea what you are getting into." I say moving away from him a little bit. I can only be so strong. "Why don't you tell me, then I'll know." I look down at my hands, and say. "I'm married." I hold my breath waiting for his reaction. Luckily it does take long before he reacts. "What? What do mean you're married? I don't see a ring or a husband. I don't even see any pictures of him in here." I take a deep breath and get ready to tell him the whole story.

Which if you review I will also tell you. So unless you tell me you want me to continue neither you or Danny are ever going to know about Lindsay and Rob's marriage, and where he's been the last two years. You wouldn't want to do that to poor Danny would you. At least I gave you a little fluff to tide you over since TPTB won't give us any. Love ya!


	7. Chapter 7

She got some explain' to do

"I met Rob about ten years ago. Rob's the guy you met here a couple weeks ago." Danny nodded and said, "Yeah, I figured that part out." I hate it when Danny's mad at me; it also makes all of this harder to tell. Oh, well I might as well get it over with. "Well, like I said we met ten years ago. Rob works for the FBI. They went to the sheriff for help on a case. There had been a kidnapping. They thought they were in the area. So we helped them look. That's how I met Rob. After the case was over, he asked me out. We dated for about two years, before we moved in together. We did that for another two years, before Rob asked me to marry him. I really wasn't sure at first. We were both in different places in our lives. Rob being ten years older then me, he was in a place were he wanted a family. I really wasn't, but I loved him and didn't want to lose him, and what he had. So I said yes and we got married. Everything was fine for awhile. He worked a lot, and I worked a lot. That seemed to work for us, which should have been a clue that we shouldn't be married. Rob got a really big drug involved case, where he had to go out of town a lot, which never bothered me. I was to busy with my work to notice that he was even gone. In fact if he hadn't told me every time he left, I probably wouldn't have even known he was gone, which should have rung some warning bells. Rob's part with the case got bigger. He had gotten some of the major players to trust him, so they wanted Rob to go fully undercover. Nobody knew how long it was going to take, and he wouldn't be able to make contact with me or any of his family. We talked about it and decided he should do it. I could never ask him not to do his job. I would never want him to tell me not to do mine. So he left. The only thing that really changed in my life was that everyone in town wanted to know where he was. They all thought he had left me. I know this because my sister-in law heard the rumor going around town. It kind of bothered me a little. I started to realize about that time that our marriage was not working out, which was hard for me, because I felt like I had failed. That I wasn't a good wife or even a good person." I pause and look at Danny.

Danny is looking at me, and I can't really tell what he is thinking or feeling. I look back down at my hands and continue my story. "Rob had been gone for two years. I hadn't heard from him since he left. I decided I needed to move on with my life. By this time I had become a CSI. I was working a lot more then before. I thought it would be a good idea to concentrate fully on work, and not to think about the past anymore. It wasn't long after that, I got a call from Mac. I moved here and left all that back in Montana.

Rob called me back in October, telling me he was back, and he was coming to New York as soon as could. He called the night we were supposed to go to dinner. That's why I didn't show up. I really am sorry about that." I look up at him again so he can really see how sorry I am. "Wow, I don't think I was expecting all that. In fact I don't think in my wildest imagination I could have thought of any of that." I nod, and say. "If I hadn't been living it, I wouldn't believe it. It kinda sounds like a soap opera, if you think about it. I can't believe my life is a soap opera. That is so depressing." I close my eyes and lean my head on the back of the couch. I stay like that until I hear Danny clear his throat. I open my eyes and look at him, "What's going to happen between the two of you now? What was tonight? There is still a lot I don't understand." Those are good questions. Now I hope I can give him some good answers. "We have filed separation papers. Unfortunately the laws of Montana, which is were Rob filed for divorce, we have to be legally separated for a year before we can get divorced. Apparently the two years he has been gone don't count, because it wasn't legally documented or something like that. So we have to wait a year for the divorce. Tonight was, I don't know. I have tried really hard to resist this thing between us. It wouldn't be fair to any of us. Tonight though I just didn't feel like resisting, maybe because my conscious feels a little less guilty now that we are separated. I don't know, but the reason I stopped was because it's not fair to you. I shouldn't have dragged you into all of this. I shouldn't have let you kiss me. I'm so sorry." I can't look at him this time. I feel so bad. "You're right it was unfair to me. You should have told me a few months ago when I asked you out. You should have let me make my own decision about all of this." I feel the tears start coming to my eyes. "I would have told you I still wanted to try this." I look up in surprise. The tears are now running down my face. "Lindsay, it doesn't change how I feel about you. Yeah, it complicates things a little, but you now have someone to lean on through all of this." Danny starts wiping the tears from my face with his thumbs. "You mean you still want to go out with me. Even though I hid the truth about my life from you, and pushed you away. Even though I won't be able to get a divorce for a year." He stops wiping my tears, and cups my face in his hands. "Hey, you're separated. It's not like we'd be doing any thing wrong, and it would also be good if you stopped hiding stuff. I care about you Lindsay. I think I've made that clear. I want this. I want you." With his hands still cupping my face, he leans in and kisses me.

Hey, guys! I am going with Anna's real age on this. She is 34, so 10 years ago she would have been 24. So she would already be a cop. You also might be wondering about the separated for a year thing. Well in North Carolina were I live that is the law. My parents and my sister went through the same stupid thing. They had to be separated for a year before they could get a divorce, something about time to change your mind. Let me know what you think.


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry it's been so long, I haven't had a lot of time to sit down and write.

Date

It's been a week since Danny and I had our talk. He said he wants to take me out on a date, but we both have been so busy at work, at the end of the day we both just want to crash.

I walk into our office and sit down at my desk. I open the folder I brought with me, and start entering the information into the computer. After about five minutes Danny comes walking into the room. "Montana, you just finished that Martin case, right?" He asks standing next to my desk. "Not yet. We are waiting on a few results. Why?" I say leaning back in my chair, so I can look at him. He sits down on the corner of my desk. "I thought tonight might be a good night for our date. Do you think you can get out on time tonight?" Danny says, giving me a very charming smile. The smile I can't resist, not that I would let him in on that little bit of information. "I think I can do that. What'd you have in mind?" His smile gets even bigger, and he also gets that twinkle in his eyes. "I was thinking I'd take ya to that Chinese place you like so much. How does that sound?" Now I smile, because he knows me so well. "That sounds great." "Good. I gotta meet Flack, so I'll meet you here at the end of shift. Okay?" I nod, and say. "I'll be here." Danny looks around then bends over and gives me a kiss on the lips. Then he whispers in my ear. "You look beautiful today." Then he stands back up and walks away. My skin is still tingling from his warm breath on my neck. I better shake it off and get back to work; otherwise I'll start to drift off to my day dreams full of Danny. If I do that I won't get any work done, and that means no date, and no real life Danny. We can't have that, can we?

I know this was short, but like I said I haven't had a lot of time to write. I will get to the actual date as soon as I can. Thank you guys for all the great things you have written in your reviews.


	9. Chapter 9

The Date part two

It's almost seven-thirty and still no Danny. We were supposed to meet here in our office at seven, so we could go to dinner. It's supposed to be our first date, and he's a half an hour late. This can not be a very good sign, of things to come. Maybe, he decided to stand me up, like I stood him up. No, Danny wouldn't do that. I truly believe he really cares about me. Hell, he took that whole me being married thing very well. I'm sitting here at my desk, coat and purse all ready to go, and he's not here. I'm startled out of my thoughts when my cell phone beeps letting me know I have a text message. I look down and see that it's from Danny. It's about time I hear from him, even if it's only a text message. _'Got called 2 a scene. Running late, sorry. Be there soon. D' _Well, I can't fault him for that. If we get called we have to go. I turn to my computer, and start a game of solitaire.

Two hours later I see Danny walking down the hall towards the office. I grab my stuff so we can get out of here quickly, because I'm hungry. He pops in, and has the most pathetic look on his face. "I am so sorry. Are you mad at me?" Danny asks. I laugh a little as I stand up and walk over to him. I kiss him and say, "No. You can't help being called in. That is the great part about dating a co-worker. I will never get mad at you when work comes first, because I understand. Now let's go I'm hungry." I take his hand and pull him out of the office and down the hall towards the elevator. When the elevator doors close, he pulls me into his arms and kisses me. "I think I'm going to like dating a co-worker." Then he kisses me again.

Dinner was very good, and we had a lot of fun. We talked about everything, our families, our childhoods, hobbies, and food. Danny told me about his playing baseball in collage and how he hurt himself. I told him how I wanted to be a singer when I grew up, until I found out I couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. We laughed about it. Well, he did most of the laughing. All in all we had a great first date.

When we get to my apartment, I realize this is the awkward 'do we or don't we' part. I normally don't have sex on the first date, but that's because I normally don't know the guy very well or for very long. Danny and I have known each other for almost two years. I trust him and I also really care for him a lot. I wonder what Danny is thinking. When we step through the door, Danny closes it and locks it behind us. I put my coat and purse down, then took Danny's coat. When I turn around Danny is standing so close our bodies are touching. He puts his hands on both sides of my face. They both slide partially into my hair. He always likes touching my hair, one way or another, it's cute. He leans down and kisses me. This kiss reminds me of our first kiss, passionate and out of control. Danny starts walking backwards pulling me along with him. I guess I don't need to wonder what he is thinking anymore, especially now that one of his hands have moved down to the buttons on my shirt, undoing each one very slowly and caressing my skin where each button was released as he goes down. Before we make it to the bedroom door we both have our shirts half off. I'm glad he wore a button down shirt instead of a t-shirt today. That way we don't have to stop kissing to pull his shirt over his head. When we get to the bedroom the shirts were gone and he was already working on my pants. We closed the door and… You know what the rest is private. I think this is the part where I tell you we lived happily ever after, but to tell you the truth, I don't know that we do. I do know that we love each other, ( He tells me later after we make love. It was very sweet.) and we are going to try and make it work. We are both very happy and my divorce will be final soon. Rob figured out a way to rush things. Who knows I might get married again someday. Wish me luck.

The end

I hope you guys liked my story. I'm sorry I didn't finish the love scene, but it has been a few years since I have done one. I'm a bit out of practice. I know this ending seems rushed, but my life has gotten really crazy, and I don't think I will be able to write for awhile. I didn't want to leave you guys hanging. Thank you so much for the great reviews. That helped me so much. I may not be writing for awhile, but I will be reading. So you guys keep up the good work. Love you guys! Yeah, 'Sleight out of hand'. Love me some D/L!


End file.
